Dual, econ, hell, shiv, aunt, puppy. 1 out of 6. T9 word needs to learn how to cuss like me.
Do you know how hard it is to get cum out of a straw hat!?
and then he tried plucking my nose hairs. lines were crossed.
You texted me 'I am the leopard prince', with a series of pictures of you posing in what seemed like cat poses. you were not "a little bit" drunk dude..
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I got a second ticket last night for drunkly using my one call to order a pizza and get it delivered at the police station
It looks like I colored my belly button red at some point
You shouldn't have to. I think you should bust into work like "pay homage to my magical vagina!"
He added me to his contacts as 'boot and rally'...have you ever been more proud to be related to me?
I can't wait to tell mom.
Imagine Arby's curly fries spiraled around a dick
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Duck, Duck, Goose is now the autocorrect, safe for work version of fuck, fuck, loose.
If you get me a sex toy for Christmas everyone in my family will question our relationship.
You burped in your shoe and whispered 'you're mine now'
I'll be honest, this year's Vegas trip will be nothing short of disappointing if there's no repeat of the angry ménage a trios in a closet.
Found your bra
Where?
Hanging in the tree
I just got fed by 3 guys. I love my job.
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