And she was only 16?
You say that like it's a bad thing.
I don't know where my bra went.
Welll you ran into the street, took it off and yelled "I'm a free woman!". And then you threw it at some homeless guy.
hahaha my homeschooled cousin put up graduation pictures. it's just her standing in front of her fire place. With a hand made diploma.
When they say "all expenses paid" does that include bail?
ATTENTION ALL CONTESTANTS OF SLUTFEST 2012 ; not only will we be judging on how many penis you have sucked but also girth and length will be calculated. If you are found lying you will be disqualified. Remember your fellow participants will be rendering the same services to probably the same people. So choose wisely and let the games begin!
Why is your name written on my hand surrounded by hearts and a bartenders phone number?
There was an Altoids can full of urine in the bathroom. I do not want to know what was going on in there.
He was making Jim beam nachos. Chips soaked in whiskey with cheese
Eye drops are like seatbelts of being high. Think about it
The way I kissed her was actually pretty charming and then it devolved to car sex
IF I CANT STRIP TO SANTA BABY THEN WHY EVEN HAVE CHRISTMAS.
You'll love it there. Trust me. Cheap tequila, pretentious beer, tall white guys who will treat you badly. Its got everything you like.
Rock bottom: having sex rejected while your boyfriend talks in his sleep as you stuff your face with Girl Scout cookies
Yeah last night got weird fast. No lie, a kid pulled a butt-plug with a tail out of his ass.
At least your wife cheated on you. Women will feel bad for you. In a month there will boy bands that are jealous of your dick
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