your profile still reads that you like women...interesting? I think there is some photography and video that will show otherwise
Drunk on an escalator. I fell like 15 flights of stairs without actually moving more than 5 feet.
I'm going to come in a little later this morning....there's no heterosexual way to say this....$1 flip flop sale at old navy
Every day I regret the life decisions that led me to bank management and NOT being a coke addicted stripper. Every. Single. Day.
As I was driving her home she congratulated each and every deer we saw for making it through the first day of dear season.
Drinking wine in my childhood bed getting ready to go to sleep in order to wake up for my menial temp job. Thanks, college degree, I can handle the real world.
You blacked out and then went around stealing other peoples phones and leaving yourself voicemails
I got two from random numbers, the first was me and said "Don't forget you murdered Josh in Wii Bowling"
The second Jenn said "You are ridiculously smart for drunk dialing yourself"
If it makes you feel any better... I have a friend who found out her mom was in the video for 2 Live Crew's "Pop That Pussy"
I got dressed on his front steps, peed on his neighbors lawn, then did a shoeless walk of shame home at 5am...
you look like you're about to get down on your knees and give america the business.
the straight edge chick smoked with me, because according to her my bowl is pretty
you said you couldn't hang because you had to masturbate and feed your lizard
Just bought a gingerbread house kit and pregnancy tests. Happy holidays.
Am i obligated to tell my sister her girlfriend was my one night stand three months ago?
His wife found the thong I “forgot” in his glovebox
Randomize