Tip #47, don't trim the bush when you have the shakes!
that's an acceptable place to lick
Kay wants to put chicklets in our cooters to make beavers and take pix captioned Got Wood? Taking public transit does scary things to her.
Have you not heard of Jennifer's supreme lust for William Shatner? She wants to eat Taco Bell off of his love handles
I kind of feel like guidos are mythical creatures.
its like fishing. just send her some cock shots to keep her on the hook then use tequila to reel her in
We almost died tonight..we almost die every night. but tonight was the closest by far
I figured, if I'm going to wear a gold cape its pretty safe to assume I'll be blacking out as well.
Just headbutted a photographer. This convention just got really interesting.
He said he wanted to make me his Twinkie, "filled with his delicious cream." ABSOLUTELY 100% NO YOU MAY NOT REPEAT ****NOT**** GIVE HIM MY NUMBER EVER EVER EVER. Please confirm receipt and full comprehension of this message.
So he says "my girlfriends coming over so you have to leave but I love you"
Good news. I heard back from the doctor and I don't have a liver problem.
...yet.
The strip clubs here are like a safari of penis, and I'm gonna bag me a rhino.
after sex he fell asleep with his water bottle in one hand and his dick in the other at 6pm. I'm a winner.
I haven't felt more like a college student than when I woke up this morning naked with my sociology textbook in front of me and my bong in my left hand.
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