my mkouth tastes houw teh zoo smelllls
And, I saw Emily's panties. How? She doesn't sit like a lady.
Good cause the way I see it, we are down to DAYS left of college so we should have as much naked fun as possible. And Jenga really facilitates that.
just stole 2 cases of forties from some freshman in the woods by pretending to be a cop. that ten dollar spotlight is really turning a profit
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I spent part of my valentines extracting candy hearts from a woman's vagina. The entire time I was thinking "this job pays for my Mercedes. This job pays for my Mercedes. This job pays for my Mercedes."
I've literally already typed in by booty call text for friday night. all I have to do now is wait for is drunk me to press send
Holy crap, church bells in Cibolo just scared the hell out of me. I'm pretty sure they were yelling sinner at me.
I never notice how majestic and beautiful my cat is unless I'm blazed
CALL 911 HAND IS STUCK IN THE GARBAGE DISPOSAL. HELP
Do we still have any pizza left from last night?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Apparently while fucking a girl in the ass last night I cracked a molar, trying to find a dentist now.
Like we just had a bunch of sex and then he threaded my eyebrows in bed lol. It was amazing
I mean, if you want to light yourself on fire for maximum accuracy, far be it from me to stop you
last night we watched this really loud chick try and pick up this smoking french guy who's english was sooo bad. she finally pointed at her beer and then her vagine
gross
like you've never done an interperative dance for sex, please
Its safe now. But... Nobody should sleep on my bed tonight.
just saw a kid waiting at the door of the stairs for the elevator. there is no elevator in this building. get on his level.
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