is it mean to send ur x his condoms back because they are too small for ur new boyfriend?
I found the perfect eye liner, it passed the blow job test, no smudging!!
Someone shattered a urinal.
WHY AM I BEING COCKBLOCKED BY A KID PLAYING HAVA NAGILA ON THE SAXAPHONE
I mean besides the fact someone got stabbed, I still had a pretty good night.
The closest thing to a sext that you will ever receive from me is a picture of pepperonis on Greg's asscheeks, clenching.
I cannot even describe to you the most amazing ass I have ever had the pleasure of seeing walk up the stairs in front of me just now.
Talk about an dramatic entrance, girl rolled up on a stolen bike and was wearing heels and a dress, through it on the ground and said "you guys want a bike?" Of course i jumped on that shit, any sane person would!
My new years resolution is going to be to stop drunk snapchatting old hook ups asking them when we're going to bang again
He said I have a comfortable vagina. What does that even mean?
I give out orgasms like candy and ride a motorcycle...how is that not appealing
Let's ride this possibly pregnant train together
Just got a handjob in my psych lecture. You were right, going to class is paying off.
Whatever you wanna call it i just wanna get railed tonight
I brought coffee but not enough for the naked guy on your porch
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