how many princess gummy vitamins will it take to negate last nights drinking binge?
He gave Paula abdoul a run for her crazy
fine. I googled it. you have to eat 5 to die so apparently I'm in the clear.
You screamed at all of us and then showed us your sack. You're like the boyfriend of my dreams.
I'll just dance on top of the ping pong table, and if it's stable enough for that, then it's stable enough for sex
For future reference, the blowjob coupons I gave you for your birthday are NOT transferable to pay your friends for tacos.
Sincerely would love to tap that, on a mountain with the wind blowing on your pubes .
I've never danced to a Michael Jackson song in a bar and left alone bro. Something in girls loves a guy who dances to mj
They just showed up to the party with a shopping cart full stolen of naty ice cans, no boxes, just cans. Shit just got real !
The security deposit's gone, let's trash this motherfucker
What's worse having drunken sex with hot married man or breaking the diet one week in?
I'm just so full of love and alcohol
I have 3 bottles of vodka in my room telling me not to go to work tomorrow.
i should probably stop doing things just because i think they’re funny. i’m not going to.
You really do take on your dog's personality she sounded like her pug breathing when we were going at it.
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