I just spent an hour correcting all the grammar and spelling of all the 2pac songs on my ipod
How do you know one of your one night stands hasn't produced a child? You may have hundreds of kids.
Pretty sure I don't. One night stands are purely anal..no exceptions.
can't believe I ate straight coffee grounds to stay awake for that
All i remember was he was wearing billibong pants... well actually my mom found that out for me.
Pass out mid-funnel last night.
A donut and a mojito for breakfast...Helloooooo Derby Wekkend!
i normally make it a rule to leave when white people start rapping... but they had blow.
I got woken up by a construction worker, turns out I was laying in a hallway, naked and wrapped in a matress pad. To answer your question no, I did not study for this test I got David Hasselhoff drunk
I just heard my parents fuck. What. The. Fuck. My rooms right under theirs.. My dad barely even lasted a minute. Im almost ashamed..
some girl at the bar told me my beard would tickle every inch of her body till she joy puked her face off.... that was so random and odd i just had to buy her a drink for having the guts to say it to me. WTF
Halfway through lecture, some kid in the front row threw up IN his hands. Professor held the door for him to carry it out.
Remember when we used to go to the bathroom to do drugs together? Now it's to help you with your spanx.
The last thing I remember was naked hot tub and taking a shot and using the hot tub water as a chaser. Not acceptable.
Wow it must be so difficult to be as popular as you are and smoke as much weed as you do
Did he think I was flirting with him when I ordered a hot dog bc no