I got fucking wesley sniped last night by that power hoe. How'd it end up on your end? Did you canoodle the stripper enough for her to agree to go to formal?
I chugged a bottle of robotussein and i ducking saw a blind lady on a purch sewing a shirt! And a tree portal
So yes it WAS her period, NOT a nose bleed.
highlight of my day: just saw a crying girl get dropped off at home wearing only socks, booty shorts, and a dirty wifebeeter. I wonder what happened to the costume...
swear to god some girl just crawled out of the washing machine. this is intense.
and honestly a story about how you met your future husband that DOESN'T include the words "creeped him on facebook" is really not a story worth sharing
You can't be mad because the taco bell people like me and not you. I'm not the one that puked in front of them.
somehow this turned into a costume party you have to get here now with my banana suit or I'm wearing my birthday suit
Please. That's just a patriotism boner. I watched Michael phelps win another medal and had to change my underwear.
Actually, I take that back. You can only have it if I'm allowed to French braid the mullet.
You asked me what the point was. Told me your were dying alone and then had me take you and Wendy's where you bought 3 meals and ate them in about 10 minutes saying you didn't care if you got fat...
I'm on the fast track to lesbian land
Currently rolling a blunt in the bathroom of Planned Parenthood
Got 3360 Shoppers points for buying Plan B. I guess this all worked out for the best.
You can’t homewreck what the Lord hath brought together.
Randomize
