We can smell you smoking weed from downstairs and your little brother is asking why the upstairs smells like gasoline. Please smoke in the basement. XOXO dad.
No. Especially when my uncle started stripping. Too many shots. So that's where I get that from.
What do you think it is?
It's a boy. I know it. She always manages to have a cock inside her somehow.
She got stuck in the front door. She never told me how or why.
I want to meet new people and vomit on their things instead\n
Make sure your heart doesn't explode. These are words of wisdom.
Cop came to our door looking for you. Something about sex in public and intoxication. I said you matched the description.
You wanna get laid? Be a female for once and stop bending nails to impress guys.
She's not a foreskin expert like you
Specially since he wanted to forget that we even touched, which makes it funnier because I don't think you can take back licking someone's butthole...
Mom is talking about dicks with her friends in the living room. I am 5 seconds away from scaling the bathroom window out of here.
Based on his face I'm positive he has a beautiful penis.
Just reached for my phone in my non existant pocket while it was in my hand.
I really wish you were home bc youre the only friend I could ask to use an at home waxing kit on my vagina. I need you.
They want a bedroom just for their cats. And you thought we were gay.
Randomize
