She said so on her MySpace, so it's gotta be true.
Let's bang like we're on a Lifetime Channel movie.
i was so high i thought his mole came off and was flying around
I just woke up my dad to tell him that i made out with the drummer. He wasnt as excited as I was.
He asked me how my body knew that a month was up when it was time for my period.
hot pretzels for dinner, snacks, and now breakfast...oh to be a poor college student...everyday is like a carnival.
Having skype sex with him in the lounge at 1:45am...THIS IS WHAT HE DOES TO ME
Fuck going to see The Hunger Games tonight. The only thing I'm hungry for is some dick. Let's go to the bar.
If Dave says he's going to have sex with her, he's going to fuck her retarded and turn her crazy. So run.
Just realized I probably only have one more wedding where I can say I fucked the bride.
Tell me I'm the only person you know who could punch someone at the bar, get escorted out, smoke a cig with the cop who almost arrested me AND get the security guy who escorted me out to buy me drinks.
no strings attached, like you could fuck him and then throw him off a building right after
Why is it pressure? I want to see your cute face and possibly sit on it. You make it like its a bad thing.
I just caught my bangs on fire trying to lite a bowl while driving. Thank god it wasn't my eyebrows like last time.
Ps can u get with my cousin? He's a freshman at uconn and he's very attractive but like were related....
Randomize
