Sorry, I have to go home and feed my nepotisms
Sorry, I can't talk, there's a herd of nepotisms headed my way
I can't tonight. I'm still nursing a beach sex injury. Don't wanna talk about it.
I just broke up with my girlfriend lets go find strippers that need rent money.
My whole home page is your drunken face booking, congrats.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
is it bad that the economy has gotten so bad that finding cheap gas gives me the same excitement and joy as finding a hot, blonde haired, blue eyed, tall, athletic single straight guy?
I mean she's dancing like an epileptic patato and i'd like to slap her
Just asked my dog if he was proud of me for making it home. That drunk.
Aww you are cute. With your penis. And failures.
Is it possible to rally from a drunken seizure?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Well he fell three stories from the balcony and still had the strength to fuck me for 2 hours.
I tried to open a bottle of wine with toenail clippers last night. So this morning was obviously rough.
If you think eating a bowl of leftover stuffing and drinking champagne from the bottle in dirty sweats at 9am is sexy... Then yeah, I'm your girl.
In between explaining the best feminist lenses for the myth of Persephone and doing vodka shots with my friends she dragged me into my car and gave me an Earth shattering blow job. Honestly I think I'm in love.
I can tell that I'm high when listening to celine dion becomes such a life changing experience
Does it look too obvious if I buy wine and candles!?! In my defense there is a gigantic snow storm coming.
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