Disadvantage of being gay..... my gag reflexes makes trying to make myself throw up extremely difficult.
you are hot. that is all.
who is this?
the delivery driver from silvermine.
Ok. Also I almost just threw up. Seriously. I was think to myself "really? Here? Now? At my work desk?" and then it went away.
Holy mother of cocks. I was grind-with-my-boss drunk last night.
When the cops come you probably shouldn't be poking cars with a stick.
I don't even know. I woke up in the bathtub with no shirt, covered in towels holding what appeared to be vanillia pudding mixed with captain morgan.
I love you. Happy valentines. Satin Patricks dayyyyyyyyyy. Alreadythrew up. Geeeeerait.
I'm convinced that college is the only place where one can have an existential crisis over what sweatpants to wear
So. I need to gloat. I couldn't exactly tell my family that I won this game by deep throating.
my vagradar is going off.. it smells a soldier
I was mid-sentence and you stopped me and said, "Yeah.. for my vaginas sake, I'm gonna need you to stop talking right now."
You came in last night, ate an entire avocado in silence, and then told me I should never accept rides from strangers. Not sure I even want to know what happened to you last night!
Ordered a pizza stoned. The guy handed me my pizza and I tried to pay him by handing him back the pizza.
My hands smell like vagina and ham.
Rationing the toilet paper. Only one wipe allowed. I'm scared to move too much.
Randomize
