We traveled between two mile markers in 18 seconds. Do the math.
his pokemon pajamas? the fact that he was proud of the stretchmarks on his arms? or finding out he has a daughter that went to high school with us? ...you tell me what was the dealbreaker
and his room smelled like strippers, childrens tears, and fear
We decided I could make bicurious-jitos or ho-meh-jitos or heteroflexible-jitos. But not homojitos.
Bering your kids um. Abiout tol. Throw up
Road construction signs are deceptively heavy
Would you be offended if I asked you to smoke a blunt with me while I pooped?
Well two things you gotta know if you're gonna live here. your alcohol tolerance is gonna need to go up, and people do blow. Get used to it. Nobody is gonna pressure you into it. That shits expensive
PLEASE. I won't throw up on the floor this time. Or fuck in the bathroom. Or dance on the pool table. So PLEASE.
I mean I sucked his dick at 3 AM... UNDERWATER. I think I have earned a follow back on twitter.
Just because he told you it was safe doesn't mean you should have licked it.
Also mom is not happy about me telling her how much i want the women sprinters on the Olympics to beat me up
He just got back from doing field research studying wild chimpanzees in the goddamn jungle. Obviously I fucked him.
I have dined. Now I want to get fucked.
He woke me with blue berry pancakes and a blow job. He's a keeper.
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