yes, too bad my tears were being wiped away by tits in my face
I'm always impressed by your drunken ability to quickly gauge how long it's been since you've shaved and whether or not your prospective hook up will care.
i feel like his penis is a security blanet. i cant fall asleep unless its in my hand
My rats are drinking wine. I am drinking with rats. God i am so alone.
Here’s Everything Coming To Netflix This July
we were totes just talking about. huu in the bathbub. 5 girlszzz
I swear the pregnant cashier was jealous when I bought my plan B
Ohhh. Its been awhile. Vending machine hotel condoms are $15 here who can afford to not get herpes?
I drank it. I drank the beer from '78. I drank my bday beer, I drank my soul
Here's what I don't understand. How does anyone watch you eat mayo for 12 minutes and then ever fuck you again??
19 Of The Creepiest (Most Inexplicable) Things People Experienced
Her ass is the reason I still believe in a higher power
But like now I know, men who are vegetarians are significantly worse in bed.
Vomit your little heart out. You've got a long day tomorrow
sending my old camp counselor nudes. childhood memory win or new low?
I got a discount on the lube for giving the cashier focaccia bread from work.
You date? I thought you just hooked up with your TAs