Oh man dude like 1000 to 1500 milligrams. Its gonna burn like bad though.
I had new employee orientation at the YMCA today. I showed up with a hangover, a black eye, scratches down my arm, and a sore throat from puking gin and keystone.
Just saw a british exchange student take a flyer for free dental care. Yes.
Not too sure about the toy story pull ups. The kids point to their crotch all day and say woody.
Ate lunch. Still drunk. Keep forgetting I'm in Texas but then I look around at the people and remember.
His health insurance plan WILL NOT cover Lasix surgery but it WILL cover 100% of a penis enlargment operation...
what is the most politically correct way to ask if he still hangs out with the guy that has blue hair and make meth in his car?
sitting in the bathroom telling some girl to keep puking or she will die. while holding a beer. nursing school rocks.
Our suitemates are shrooming again. I left a less colorful dress hanging on the door, change before you come in because purple is making Maeve cry.
After we were finished she said "That was like marriage sex". Should I take that as a compliment or insult?
We really gotta change brands again because 2-ply is making us feel like the celebrities we aren't.
You what they say. One dick in the hand is better than two in the bush
I just pulled back the shower curtain to reveal Cinnamon Toast Crunch and a spoon in the bathtub. Ambien is a hell of a drug.
So I figured out why that guy from Tinder stopped messaging me back. He got married.
I'm gunna wear a purple dress, so if you see someone looking confused and lost wearing purple it's probably me
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