Is it bad that when I see ugly people make out, I hope he's impotent?
you were so high you were expressing yourself in action figures
I wish I has some fucking Fairy God Parents, I want a kit kat so bad.
Just got roadhead while going 95. I came for a mile and a half.
Can you send me the video of that girl that got arrested last night? I'm gonna try and hit that and I need something to break the ice with.
It's like....nice talking about real estate but your son gave me herpes
I looked up while we were having sex to see him covering my pillow pet's eyes with his free hand. I think I'm in love
Let me put it this way - if I had a list of things I would like between my legs, she would rank below the cello I turned into firewood sophomore year.
I've reached the point in my life where I desire cats more than men
I just want brownies and waffles and someone to lick my tits
Had a grope session with a girl who looked like my Mom and had the same name as her as well. I think therapy is in order.
UPDATE: IM NOT A TEEN MOM LETS GO PARTY
That awkward moment when you bring a guy back to your place then have to tell him you only have magnums.
conclusion: canadians have really freaky sex
I have serious attachment issues. I just realized how long its been since ive smoked out of my bong and I feel guilty for dis owning it this week
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