So I got my period. Finally. In related news, I reinstated my belief in God.
Molly wanted me to tell you, "she hasnt shit on the floor in a while" like she thinks its an accomplishment.
you made wolf sounds and yelled "team me" the entire movie
I wanna fuck padma even more now that she's preggers. Is that sick?
Yes but- 100% agreed
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i called my mom using *69 and said this was the principal and Matt has a snow a day today. she believed me.
You decided to make a porno with gummy bears and things went downhill from there.
I thought about farting is his face when he was going down on me last nite.
Your the only friend that would realize I'm gonna get drunk and send coke to me at a bar before I made drunken phone calls for it. You sir complete me.....
My face feels like its stuck between a ball sack and an asshole.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm just gonna use that pot butter as dip for chips. That's fat, American AND stoner!
Apparently drunk me thought it was a good idea to buy $100 worth of band aids and stick them all over everything in the apartment.
I don't care what you say about him, his cock is the stuff dreams are made of.
I tried to bring you in when you passed out on the porch but all you said was that I "ruined your hope ands dreams of becoming an astronaut"
Thirty seconds is a long time in jizz time...
i mean ive seen your left buttcheek how much more bro can this get
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