your profile still reads that you like women...interesting? I think there is some photography and video that will show otherwise
he borrowed my computer and saw his name in my recent google searches. Things got awkward real fast.
So, just so you know... Your vasectomy worked.
bonus
When you wake up, I have rum and am in town
My vagina has officially become a vortex for sexually confused frat guys.
I'll still trying to understand the context of your "punch her with my cock" comment.
wanna tell me why theres a glass of water stuffed with tamptons in the freezer?
Dude, nobody just eats a banana these days. This chick wanted it. She wanted to get down with Charlie Brown.
I think I was the only one who knew you were acting like you weren't drunk in public issues discussion this morning. Make sure you thank me in your Academy Award Speech someday.
Don't be too mad at the guy who broke your kitchen table. Didn't get his name, but he knew all about your gay porn career. Like DETAILS...
She mentions her boyfriend one more time, I'm taking her home and breaking that shit up.
There's a guy masturbating in front of Sephora right now
I PUT IT IN THE UNIVERSE THAT I WANTED TO STAB HIM AND THEN SOMEONE DID! KARMA IS A BITCH AND SHE IS BEAUTIFUL!
I don't know, we got really drunk and I slapped her with an ear of corn.
some guy had a sword and everyones crying..it turned bad..fast.
Randomize
