Some guy on the train just glared at me. So I'm drinking tequilla out of a dixie cup. Go fuck yourself.
if by 'bottleservice' you mean 'bringing beers in my purse' then yes, we are.
Joey just asked me if I ever got anything stuck in my vag.
was it embarrassing when you had to say yes?
i got iced as i was inside of her. i fucking hate my friends
im youtubing treadmill accidents. this is what i do at 2:10am
I'll be so proud. Like a proud mama bear freeing my slut cub into the wild.
It looks like I colored my belly button red at some point
Dude true life I died at the derby...I lost everyone I knew, went down a bourbon and mud slip and slide, lost my hat, fell off the roof of a porta potty, sprained my ankle and knee and then got arrested.
You were spooning an empty magnum of white wine in the middle of the bed so I slept on the couch
Well at least there's no more confusion about your place in my life. Wine > pizza > your dick > the rest of you.
Love you...
My life is a video game called get the drunk princess back to her castle, thank you to all that participated
Before he left he told me if his girlfriend ever finds out, she'll take us both to an alley and kill us.
On a scale of 1-10, how inappropriate is it to sneak into someone's box of sex toys and put googly eyes on their vibrator?
I wish I could be the kind of drunk Bobbi is... She stumbles around outside at 4am with a broken high heel and babbling about rainbows and getting dick...
Sean just lit a cig with his taser..... I am in awe
We did blind alcohol taste testing and she got 10 of 10. I'm in love.
Randomize
