WHY CAN'T YOU EVER SHIT LIKE A NORMAL PERSON, JESSE.
When he took off his pants i accidently shouted "that is one small wiener," and thats when he left
you'd think someone with a dick that small would take what he could get
My mom walked down and caught me drinking by myself, watching the nanny at 3:30AM. I had no idea what to say
dude stop sending me pictures of your dick in weird places. i get it. you rock out with your cock out.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just got cockblocked by coyotes. This would happen to me.
These headphones make me feel like I'm sitting on John Mayers lap and he's singing just to me. I picture like a pitch black room with a single spotlight on us. Also, convinced Kyle to give me percocet soo.
if that blanket by the dog bowl was your dog's "bed" then i apologize to bailey for having sex on it
Trying to low-key throw up in the ocean is harder than it seems.
i preemptively threaten to cock slap your kids if they are snobby yuppy bitches
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She told me she was eating frosting, then I got the weirdest boner ever
So you'd go straight for a fat chick with cheese on her tits?
Yes.
Wake up. Eat bread. Find your dignity. Don't be late for work again.
Let us rub each other in fish scales and become mermaids
is it bad that im laying on a beach towel in my room with my lights on high pretending to be tanning on the beach in the summer?
I don't feel like that was meant as a compliment, but really still feels like one
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