your address is 607B right?
yeah why?
i need to tell the guy bringing over the flaming bag of dog shit where to put it
I was watching truelife I'm transgendered. This tranny already got a date a week after getting a vagina. I've had a vagina my entire life and can't get a date.
because whats more american than sleeping with a westpoint cadet on the 4th of july?
Can you explain to me how i got kicked out of a bar last night, from outside the bar?
Then pass out next to me, I'll be under a pong table or a park bench. Really depends on the weather during Mifflin
There was a cop outside the house so we just put the alcohol in this watermelon
You pretended to pelvic thrust my mother on the boat while my 92 year old grandmother looked on. Thanks.
Okay I take that back some girl just said pussy sweat. Get me outta here
How was that my fault?! I made you breakfast and gave you cake, as you asked. Then, you initiated sexual activity.
I was hoping for a marriage proposal... Or at least an offer to sleep in his bed.
ACTUALLY FUNNIEST MOMENT OF THE NIGHT WAS WHEN YOU WERE TALKING TO HIM AND YOU SAID "WHEN YOU MEET ME IN REAL LIFE I WILL BE A LOT ANGRIER." And then he said "WHEN I MEET YOU IN REAL LIFE I WILL BE LESS DRUNK, HOPEFULLY."
I don't have any soul left to be crushed.
God specifically crafted these hands to deal out orgasms.
I call bullshit
Call it what ever you want I just need to figure out how to get permanent marker off my cock
just threw up in a gas staton parking lot in front of a father and son. stared them in the eyes and finished like a boss
Randomize
