I spent a large portion of the night trying unsuccessfully to keep hayley (who was wearing a dress and no underwear) from doing handstands, but yea it was fun. the boys had fun
It's an Italian thing I guess, grew up on that shit.
I'm Irish, we don't eat cow guts unless they're blended into a fine whiskey
i wish i was a boy too so i knew what a blow job felt like
I'm tempted to see how fat I can get before he leaves me. It's obvious we're playing a game of chicken here.
I have to answer enough questions about you, I don't need your uterus tossed in the conversation.
Also, did you really start discussing the weather in the middle of telling you my sexual fantasy about you?
You told the entire smokers deck that you were blowing .08 now and anyone else willing later
Can you send me the pictures of me riding the penis
At dinner her sister yelled "he fucked me AND mom!! Up your standards hoe!!" Safe to say I ruined that family
And some neighbor just saw me naked and hunched over a bag of potato chips stuffing my face. Maybe clothes aren't a bad idea.
"Nobody needs to know that I have a vibrating butt plug and nobody needs to know that I'm probably gonna start wearing it at work"
You left me with 12 red bulls and a bottle of vodka. What did you expect?
We have been dating for 5 months. I'm friends with his sister. Yet my number in his phone is still saved as "hot bartender"
I fought off a bull with my bare hands while he went off to have sex with her against a wall. I’m more upset about the fact that no one is acknowledging what I did.
Well the cops were called after the kid fell, but we saw 4 cute guys from our window while it was going down, so it wasn't all that bad.
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