did you know that the clit is basically just a tiny penis? Ya.. So just think about that next time you're down there.
And that's when I found out that Patrick wasn't in fact down with O.P.P.
They have an open bar at this baby shower. I was born to be Cuban.
I like yr title more along "the hot Russian I have sex with."
I feel like after that many guys, all of the water in your body is just replaced with pure jizz, honestly.
They wouldn't serve more then two Shots per person, so you grabbed a group of strangers and said u werre buying them all shots, then proceeded to drink all of them.
Last night I had sex with one of the groomsmen I was in the wedding with. In a stairwell. 13 years my senior. Thinking I should retire from the bridesmaid gig.
On celebration of the Supreme Court ruling I feel it is our patriotic duty to have a threesome
We hooked up and then we watched game of thrones while he fed me chocolate. I don't see how our benafriendship is a bad thing.
saw a dude wearin soccer cleats at the bar tonight. fuckin kiddin me man?
Mind if I sleep with your cousin? If I can... thanks. If no, sorry its gonna happen.
girl pulled up to the stop sign, got out, threw up all over my hood said happy thanksgiving then drove off
I just kept thinking.. Holy shit. We're fucking in my front yard.
sitting in a shitty karaoke bar playing pokemon go and drinking a mimosa. how is your sunday night
My drunk is wearing off and im starting to feel like this dolphin tattoo was a bad idea.
Randomize
