and the mascot is a pinecone. its really no surprise that people here dont get laid
I'm going to an arts college, I live next to the frat houses, and my room number is 420. god has plans for me and I couldn't be happier.
I guess wearing a straight up bikini to class is an early indication that Thirsty Thursday has started.
Um I think everyone drunk and there's some douche on violin.
I am too young to be this hungover
Is this your way of saying you want a sober 19th?
Tomorrow, you will get a text, and it will bE spelled right, that's me yo, certify ya soon
If my penis could make facial expressions, it would constantly have a smile on.
God if that man would just have sex with me every time I got mad life would be so much easier...
I'm spending my Sunday wishing the entire Patriots offense would let me touch their manhood
She couldn't understand why my walking in on her 70 year old parents ruined any chance of a boner for at least an hour. I think she's too slow for me to fornicate with.
Dude... the time we have in life to be young and trivial is so incredibly short. I think we should drink tonight.
Remember when I convinced you to watch me eat my sandwich just so you could reuse my plate and save us money on our water bill? I'm so ecofriendly when I'm high
Okay first of all fuck you and everything you stand for because Taco Bell is amazing.
just turned another straight guy gay. Goddamn the church must hate me
I think it's a bit on the nose for the Uber driver to play stairway to heaven while driving like A psycho.
Randomize
