I'm at the bar with Ashley what should I do?
humiliate her
What I dont get about To Catch a Predator is who the fuck still uses chat rooms?
Hurry up I might actually study if I am left alone
Fucking freshmen need to learn how to puke in the bushes outside the dorm and not in the fucking elevator.
He was sitting on the bathroom floor, swirling his finger in the toilet singing the Laguna Beach theme song. I don't know whether to laugh or help him.
She dropped a weight class after every shot I took. I thought I was just drink something magical.
I just stole a cupcake from somebody's bottle service
And I got $4 when somebody made it rain.
after i talked him through a bulleted list of why we couldn't have sex he just said "but it would be fun...."
I woke up to a hotel manager knocking on my car ( window was down) and asking if I was ok
he's definitely still old enough to be your dad. even your grandfather, if you come from a line of juvenile delinquents
Hey where the fuck is the rest of my beer? Lets start this day off right
Our host-mom was rubbing her back sympathetically going "muy bien, chica" while she puked on the beach. So yeah, I think we got the best one.
you got drunk, told him he looked like shaggy and said 'I wouldn't show you my mystery machine for all the scooby snacks in the world'
I was alternating between saying "yall need Jesus" and "God bless" the entire night
Standing straight up with intensity he came in his own mouth. I know this because he showed me the video from five different angles when asked if I would like him to demonstrate. And I did.
Randomize
