She looks like an uncircumcised penis in a hat.
I wonder if i passed any courses from last semester
Did you know they have alcohol AND weed delivery in Canada??? I'm not EVER coming home
yeah, it's no longer just 'day drinking' when it's 5pm and you're knocking over fruit displays at fresh market
Just got cockblocked by coyotes. This would happen to me.
How much time is enough between masturbating and watching little bear?
this morning your mother said to me "sorry to have to meet you like this, in my sons bed" later she said "you never know whos gonna be in there. its scary sometimes"
Hes stumbling drunkenly around the streets of New York with a balloon vagina on his head. I'd say hes having a good night.
It just goes to show you, your dreams can come true. You can hook up with your dads hot married friend.
He puked in the funnel and continued to chug it. Who is this dude?
So i know i shouldnt being spending random large amnts of money...but i just bought a sword.
Here's what I don't understand. How does anyone watch you eat mayo for 12 minutes and then ever fuck you again??
Just banged your ex. So it really is 'him, not you' in that he's gay. Rodeo champion gay.
Doing coke by yourself isn't as fun. Even when you're watching a James Franco movie.
He's finally divorcing her, so naturally he tells me that we're not exclusive anymore. His penis 'wants what it wants' apparently.