Grossest hangover story of 09: Puked in the bathtub. I was in it.
Don't interrupt me, I have a limited time to be high and thus be remarkably good at Pac Man
I'll go out only because I know the starving children in third-world countries would frown upon us if we let an hour of free sangria go to waste...
woke up with withdrawal cold sweats this morning. spring break must really be over.
please tell me you didn't have sex with him in the bathroom...
Does an alley count?
the night got glorious when you tried to do an upside down keg stand with a near empty key and dropped it on your face
Champagne is a vitamin, right?
omg. i wish i could describe to you the number of things that were just in my vagina. i feel like i got gangbanged by construction workers.
I just want to have beer shits in my own bathroom. Is that too much to ask for?
In 2009 his now husband dressed in a sailor onesie and heels for pride so he needs to REMEMBER how to party
We're exchanging our favorite porn sites at 9 am. I think this brings our relationship to a whole new level
In other news: I massively over-caffeinated this morning. Everything is vibrating and I can SEE THROUGH TIME
My night has consisted of googling cat penises and creating a Tinder profile.
Btw I'm playing passed out so you can get laid but obviously you need to take the offense just ask him if he wants to go to bed and leave a cigg on the counter
woke up between a girl's legs. make your own conclusion.
Randomize