Maybe i should go to church more so i can meet girls like in that song, you know, the ones that act slutty on every day but sunday...
ah, so the catholic church. i gotcha
Just saw actual Chinese people doing a Chinese firedrill. Good day.
so i told him i have my period and he put his head by my vagina and said "I HATE YOU!"
there's no food at this bar, but i'm pretty sure vodka is made of wheat so i'm basically drinking bread.
27 Socially Expected Things That Are The Absolute Worst
Everytime I walk into a bathroom at school that I've taken a pregnancy test in I get a little bit nostalgic....
you're surprised the chick that fucked you for a free cup has herpes. i don't feel bad for you.
They sat at the bar while we waited for a table. When the hostess came to seat us, they were shitfaced, and swordfighting wth chop sticks.
it's only monday and im already failing all my classes. i give up. tequila tuesday is my only friend.
She's planning a December wedding, I'm planning on a June breakup.
These 21 People Are Related To Famous Celebrities
omg i wish you could see the front of my car.
There's literally a dust print of your body and your arm trying to hold on and the other one where your fingers visibly dragged down the hood.
Hay for your next interview you should go in with fake blood on your cloths and tell them you just finished saving a life, then cry
This is not 2004 anymore. It's not acceptable to get fingered while watching 'Ferngully' in a basement full of your friends.
What are we just gonna be those girls that get fucked in your parents basement and not get taken to dinner? I don't wanna be those girls.
Note to self: never fuck a Canadian, surprisingly highly disappointing
WHEN THE HELL DOES ANYTHING IN OUR LIVES *EVER* GO AS PLANNED???