how did your night go?
he asked for my myspace name.
thank you for a lively/lovely evening :)
should have blown me.
I woke up to a text that said "You're a fucking asshole" Why is she so pissed at me?
Im guessing it has something to do with running up to her boyfriend screaming "THIS IS SPARTA" and kicking him in the balls.
Is that considered a cock block?
Every time I hit my bowl my neighbors set off fireworks... I stop, they stop. I start again, they start again. Too high for this.
he gave me a new purse full of weed and five boxes of samoas for my birthday. best boyfriend ever.
We just shotgunned beers for America
I would totes be making out with random people in the name of america if I was at the white house right now
At least I'm doing lines with a notecard. That counts for something right
Can't wait to bequeath this flannel to my grandchildren someday.
'I've been using this to pick up lesbians since before you were born!'
I hooked up with a guy that had a beard last night felt like I was building a fucken log cabin
i peed in the parking lot at work not even thinking, a woman saw
He took a picture of me to show his boss why he was late...Is that a compliment or not?
This time last year I was crying in a church parking lot without shoes or a bra, so the years can only go up from here
I love you. Go after that dick
Instead of.being an intelligent and mature adult and dealing with my feelings I chose to get hammered and fuck flounder
Eh it happens
Randomize
