My lawyer watched my DUI video. Said of the thousand or so he's seen, mine was one of the top ten best.
Fuck Jersey, the house im in is so baller but this state just cannot win.
We walked into the bar in The Flying V formation from The Mighty Ducks. We were ready.
woke up to 35 texts all saying im cheating on her
me and last nights hook up spent two hr. figuring out a reply we went with i love you..
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She said "I only hook up with guys I'm dating"
So... What happend then?
We dated for an hour, i broke up with her after. BOOM.
so, the parking garage attendent caught us humping in the car. long story short, we have free parking whenever we want! take that abstinence.
Preparing for wine wednesday. How would you feel about improvising and starting a white russian wednesday tomorrow instead? you know, shake things up a bit.
I'll have to explain it to you tonight when i call drunk. It will sound better
I had no where to run... The dumpster sounded like a good idea at the time
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
This girl caught me staring at the cat but stroking the computer because it was closer, which is why I hate blunts.
I think you should just bang him and get it out of your system.
That's what you say about everyone.
Gotta get new sheets. ..I fucked the satin off mine.
I just want it to be said that I had sex in my Belle dress last night. Classy motherfucker.
You've reached your one pic per night limit. To increase your limit, start conversations before 9 and submit your request for an additional pic before 10.
I just remembered I casually gave you a tour of the house after we boned...lol
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