im pretty sure that there was a mint leaf in my poop this morning. i love mojito season.
I miss you. Just wanted to say that before the drugs kicked in so it's legit.
Mom's drinking. Just asked her if she was good to walk back to the condo. She seemed unsure until she remembered she brought the GPS. We are 2 blocks from the condo.
My vagina is scared and excited at the same time. It might not be able to sleep tonight.
If he really loved his girlfriend then he'd wear a condom when he fucks me.
Typcal friday morning so far. Puke, shower, commute/puke, coffee, puke, coffee, bagel, good to go. Lunch today?
By getting lucky do you mean I get one of your incredible BJs or you not killing me by the end of dinner?
I almost bumped into a man wrapped only in a blanket at 10 am
I'm gonna give him birthday punches. On the dick. With my mouth.
We're having Wednesday-night goat-night at the bar.
It's hard to explain...
I have a cracked rib, no way in hell I'm bottoming for him tonight!
T minus 20 hours until we forget our names, find some city cowboys, and g&t into the night.
My sex life reached a new low tonight: we stopped into this bar so I could pee and when I got out of the bathroom my parents had ordered a round for us and this traveling nurse they met and were trying to run game for me. Saddest part? She was actually going for it.
Leaving the puke on the ceiling as a reminder.
I remember her making the first martini but the rest of the weekend is a blur of vodka, high heels and sex toys.
First time being used by a cougar. Definitely okay with it
Randomize