Holy fuck. She looks like Vin Diesel's stuntman
I just found 3 condoms in my math textbook... in the probability section... Under dependent and independent events...
Maybe you should go over there and lead him on and reach down his pants like he's about to get some and yank his balls.
That's the best idea I've heard all day.
i just got cum up my nose. i would have expected more from the captain of the men's lacrosse team
He was carrying a rolled up carpet saying he was saving it for tomorrow's Walk of Fame.
I forgot to tell you thank you for putting me out when I was on fire. im sure I'll laught about this someday...
Can we end it on a good note at least? Can we fuck and then never talk again?
When I woke up everyone at the party was in their underwear. Only you guys were playing strip pong.
Yes, we all have the power to convince a large amount of people to take their clothes off
You screamed "There's a potato in my anus" and proceeded to attempt to grind with the bouncer. Also, I'm pretty sure our Chem teacher was in the same bar as us.
So your bra was hanging in the Christmas tree last night at some point I think
Who spent today in nothing but a vajazzle and candy thong? SORRY NOT SORRY
well one of us has to be wrong and it's not going to be me
I found the crust to my pizza under my covers that's cool
Had to walk of shame past Westminster Abbey this morning. Pretty sure a Japanese tourist took a photo of me.
I never thought I'd be on my couch watching Star Trek, getting my tits rubbed while crying.
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