I promise you 4 toothbrushes taped together and lube does not do the trick
My dad just gifted me an alaskan flag he stole from the govenor's mansion. He said it was to hang on the wall at 3316, to start a morning ritual. Then he mimed kegstands and vomiting. Senior year will be epic.
I don't even know where to begin....there's queso sauce and public hair stuck to everything
I have a surprise for you
Is it drugs? I want drugs. Or a puppy!
I know everytime I get my paycheck I'm like "I should probably renew my gym membership" and then I just buy more alcohol
I wish him all the best and hope one day he can afford the surgery to remove his head from his ass
Just walk up to him nice, spread your legs like smooth peanut butter on toast and scream "LOOK AT MY BEAVER! LOOK AT IT!!"
Dude, chad is laying across the room, violently, passionately, pornographicly eating something and I seriously think the 'some thing' is fighting back.
I was looking threw the photos on my phone. There is 8 different ones of us peeing on things.
Dropping acid was like seeing the whole world as a blank canvas to imagine anything I wanted.
And apparently all you wanted was to watch the sun explode and me take 60,000 dicks to the face.
Then again, he has huge mansions.
*manboobs.
Nothing like the soothing screaming of your neighbor getting boned while eating a pizza on the front porch.
and then I said "oh, I see the price of Plan B has gone up". and the pharmacist looked at me very sadly. I was just trying to make conversation.
Some girls mom just approved of me banging her on Fb.... For the whole world to see.. I'm officially a god.
You need a new phone. When you talk it sounds like the teacher from Peanuts while she's trying to give a blowjob.
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