I just woke up to a lawnchair covered in lipstick. I'm wearing red lipstick. What happened and is the tequila?
Making out with married ex girlfriends: priceless
After he proceded to violently molest my tits until 9 am i snuck out of his room only to meet his mother downstairs, who informed me she heard the giant sexfest going on in the room next to them.. this was before she called us both "chickenshits".. worst walk of shame ever.
its summer. and we all know college gfs do not count in summer.
college gfs dont count ever. theyre like getting corn rows in jamaica. you feel cool at the time. then you go home and people make fun of you.
It was like a lincoln log. Seriously. I don't know who's more pissed, me or my vagina...worst.hookup.ever.
He was on Keeping Up with the Kardashians it was like a deed from god to bang him
Just had to pull out another loan to pay for that public drunkenness citation. I am so ready to graduate.
Who are these men, what are we doing here, how is this helping us toward our goals of sex and pasta? Things to consider.
one minute he's happily playing with a lighter and the next thing I know, he's screaming and the swing set is on fire
I just remembered something. Did we really all flash the cab driver to get half off?
Due to your tardiness, I'm saving you my tab
I immediately regret the tequila decision.
You've seen the quality of dick pics I normally get. The bar is high.
It was a good hour of moans, penis compliments, smacks, and what sounded like someone running in flip flops
lord you gonna make me abandon my soup for tasteful catboy nudes
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