i fuckib htae you, you church bitch.
just come out here and I will go home with you...
we have officially mastered the walk of shame
It's like alcoholism for beginners at my kitchen table.
We are taking shots off of spoons and listening to Mary Poppins.
currently wearing a football players overly sized underwear. discovered a shot count on my leg. I'm a tank hahahhh
I'm on a no morals kick. That'll be 3 girls in 24 hours....ending 2011 with a bang
your blue lips and tongue was their first indication you were probably underage
HEY THERE IS NO AGE LIMIT ON BLUE SLUSHIES
Mehhh. I just tried to type 'extremely', and it auto corrected to 'creek rot'. IT KNOWS WHAT I LOOK LIKE
I mean technically the bite was both in my nose and on the outside of it. I thought I was going to need stitches or something.
Why was his mouth around your nose anyways?
It was just one of those nights, man.
He said that he made a girl squirt to the ceiling and I got curious
He said he "doesnt care at all, really" if I shave my legs or not. Challenge accepted.
One time she showed me her pierced nipples in our high school locker room and now she has a daughter
I don’t mind that he’s uncircumcised. It’s the fact that he talks about the Bible immediately after we have sex .
Well, thanks for not letting me sleep with anyone, but no thanks for telling everyone I have the clap.
Randomize
