Btw the nut in my hair goes great with my outfit !!! :(
Can I use cash for clunkers to trade in her boobs for a new set of 18 year old tits?
Its worth a shot.
He is going overseas for 8 months, not only was that blowjob a going away present, but i was supporting the troops
well i fell out of the hot tub and tumbled down the hill and kicked a plant in the process.
the worst part was waking up this morning to his skrillex ringtone.....when was it ever okay for friends to let other friends go home WITH GUYS LIKE THAT!?
I woke up to 76 pages of e's, r's, d's, and f's from when I fell asleep for 3 hours on my laptop keyboard trying to write that paper.
Also 70% sure I have a splinter on my eyelid from last night
I don't know what was up he just kept sitting in his chair smoking weed and watching home movies all night it was weird as fuck.
Looks like I've become the Walter White of my PhD cohort.
You rubbed a frozen pizza in my face. The concerning part was that it was semi cooked from our body heat
Bought pregnancy tests in bulk off amazon. Kinda feel insulted that it asked if I wanted to subscribe for regular shipments.
All my friends are getting into relationships and going through breakups and I'm having Plan Bs and crunch wraps for dinner.
Oh my god.. Saw a commercial for Captain Morgan. Made me gag a little bit.
Totally reading about penis envy for my final exam
my favorite part was when you kept waving @ that guy and insisiting it was your cousin..and it wasnt and wondering why he wasnt waving back lol you were legit PISSED
Randomize