let me know it goes. try not to get bit. and if you can, get someone to videotape it.
Any particular reason you put 2 smashed up limes in my back pocket last night?
neither the pictures you took nor my hangover explain why there are skittles in my shoe
Not even the dog will look at me anymore.
Every day I regret the life decisions that led me to bank management and NOT being a coke addicted stripper. Every. Single. Day.
He asked me to grab his balls and yell "thats a spicy meat-a-ball" Last time I do requests.
how did he go about obtaining bull sperm?
So he didn't pull out. And I like flipped out. And the he told me to chill and opened up a drawer full of packs of Plan B and handed me one.......
He told me he's not in to anal. I need to marry him, ASAP.
The strip club called, they have your shoe.
Im rolling a blunt of encouragement for you to return to
NOLA update. Went to Corey Smith at the house of blues last night. Drank PBR and took lots of shots of Jack. Too drunk, cabbed it to the hotel and fell asleep while having sex. Not my finest moment. Now I'm in court. I can't wait to be your attorney.
you're the third guy in less than 24 hours she fucked. I'm glad you lost your virginity just don't act like you climbed Mt. Everest.
I have a knack for carnage and poetic language.
how do i act around someone who's shoes i puked in while naked and blackout?
Randomize
