he took his pants off right in front of me then just stood there so i went for his boxers and he said he was waiting till marriage
Ed hardy stationary at walmart. I'm betting snookie wishes she knew how to write
One reason I don't come to Portland. I saw 8 guys I have had sex with last night. At the same party.
By 8 I mean 9.
And by 9 I mean 10.
You unbuttoned your shirt and started walking down the center of the road screaming traffic stops for Enrique Iglesias.
Drunk off five beers on a Tuesday. I'm not sure which part of that statement is more sad
This needs to stop. I just vacuumed the wall. Adderall is a double edged sword.
Why the fuck is the royal wedding at 4am. That is obviously not the most appropriate time to drink during finals. It's like I'm bound to fail, by royal decree.
its not that I hate him, it's just that I wish his penis was attached to someone i like more
So he drunk messaged me last night telling me he wants a baby. Think I should call his bluff?
You had a fry stuck to your face... Every five mins you would wake up, take a bite, put it back then fall asleep again...
I got a snap of someone jumping off a light pole. Was that you? Please confirm or deny. #onWisconsin
She told me the only rule was that I couldn't cum on her Batman blanket.
i sent him a picture of his friend's dick and told him he should really stop thinking he's my only option.
Its just akward. Everytime he tells me he loves me, I have to respond with, I love having sex with you. and he just stares at me in amazement
Idk, but the girl in his story had really nice eyebrows and was singing The Climb. How about you CLIMB the fuck away from my man
FORGET THE EYEBROWS
Randomize
