Needless to say when I told my parents they loved me less
It would be worth it to see how drunk he is right now.
He cartwheeled into the side of the neighbor's garage.
Ok, i'm coming over
i asked a few people if they wanted to make pancakes with me but no one would. thats why i'm drunk by myself right now
Drunk. Just jacked off for the third time in an hour. I love not being Catholic anymore.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I was tackling you out of excitement
Yeah thank goodness the stripper pole was there to break my fall.
there are casual beer cans in all of the public trashes, i belong here
The basket that the Naughty Easter bunny left for you at my house might keep us entertained for a little while...
If we laid all the dicks that's have been inside of us end to end it would be as tall as 4 story building. 40 feet of dicks.
Admittedly shitfaced... I have two questions. 1)why is the fan in my bathroom on? (Sub-text: is there a ghost?). 2) is your underwear really argyle?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Oprah Winfrey is a jealous, vengeful god
You're going to hell! And you're going to hell! And you! And you. You're all going to hell!!!
So it's safe to say that it's all down hill from here
Do you mean easy livin or downward spiral of alcoholism and disappointment
My brother walked up to us as we were making out and was like "hey man, go to town!" and winked
I lick assholes and I wouldn't eat mdma
She'd probably like you more if you'd stop fucking her husband.
Our orgasm ration was 1:45. No. Fucking. Joke. I thought I was going to die.
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