I don't plan to be alive for 2010 so ima say this 12 hours early. Happy New Year bitches
No. one of us needs a degree and I am already the alcoholic friend. I can't do everything
That's saying a lot from the girl who takes her liquor with her to the library
We're learning about the color wheel. Hello college.
You left your underwear here. I'm hanging it on my door
Oh and I found some acid for the drive back to school, productive day
I'm amazed your boyfriend is still with you, how do you manage to pee on him while he is holding you in his lap?
You might not want to come home tonight. Mom just found your vibrator and now she won't stop sobbing and holding a framed picture of you as a little kid.
She saves ONE person's life while blacked out and now she's positive anything can be done "while fucking hammered"
Is this one of those "if you didnt give such good head we couldn't be friends" moments?
I showed up to a booty-call in my onesie pajamas and rubber boots
I hate waking up Sunday morning and thinks "how many friends did I lose last night".... Normally it's between 1-5.
She found the planted magnum condom..once she figured it out it was too late.
I didn't want dick. I wanted spaghetti.
There's something sensual about taking off a pair of socks.
Randomize
