I'm just looking at Lindsay Lohan's vagina.
Oh yea! I was just doing that too!
He looks like a mix between a retired piano teacher and a cat that just swallowed a sock.
imagine if the morning after your status automatically updated with the name of the person you hooked up with
I got a black eye last night. This guy said for every 35 pounds you lose you gain an inch to your dick. I asked him how long he has been peeing sitting down.
just upgraded from jello shots to jello bowls blacking out just got that much more delicious
Who has a video camera? i want to look back on this one day and say OH thats why i spent 2 years in jail
can we change the rule from "no one is ugly after 2 am" to 1130 so i can justify last night
You couldn't find your shoe so you introduced yourself as Cinderella for the rest of the night.
Ahh that explains the text from creepy mike saying he would be my prince charming.
We're all just looking at each other quietly, hoping that no one brings up last nights shenanigans.
K, im gonna wait to get my dick pierced so we can do it as a family function.
I couldn't drink enough to fuck the friend, you said challenge accepted and stole some chicks shot.
GOT MY PERIOD AND AN INTERNSHIP OFFER THIS IS A WONDERFUL DAY
Hahah I’ve never had someone stop me mid-coitus to tell me how amazing I am. Def ego boost.
He spent ten minutes post bj, limp cock still out, in shock repeating 'best blow job ever'. So yes, yelling I am the penis queen out the car window was justified.
He’s got a big dick and a big ego. This could be fun
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