Taljing aboutpenisrs w gerruly ska pops
alright got my week's quota of sex in, ready for modern warfare 2
My financial advisor pointed out that 37% of my income is currently going towards "non-essential food items"
That's banker lingo for "you're an alcoholic"
I don't know what's happening. Everyone is wearing beaks.
I cannot take someone's straight and gay virginity in one threesome. It's just too much responsibility.
there is a money trail leading from my bathroom to my living room.. the trail ends with a half eaten bag of chips with a note that says "magical chipz".. who am i?
I'm in that weird half-dead, half fucked-simultaneously-in-every-orifice-by-a-bus-and-it-wasn't-a-good-time state.
I have suspicion of morning wood.
How are you unsure as to the current state of your penis?
What's protocol when the 18 year old son of an anti-gay preacher sends you a message on Grindr during church?
It was like being run over by an orgasm freight train.
I figured if he was OK cheating on his gf with a guy, he'd be OK with me posting his number to m4m Craigslist Ads
You used a fucking bud light like as lube last night. I'd get a UTI test like stat.
Your "whiskey dick" is glorious but also terrifying
I would say don't do anything I wouldn't do, but we both know I forget about my personal safely when getting laid is on the line
i just watched a 27 minute video about owls...that high.
Randomize
