Any toy can be an adult toy. Location, location, location.
I GOT MY PERIOD!
damn. i had names picked out.
Just saw a cop issuing a DUI. At 3 pm. It's definitely the start of winter break.
i think it was just a coincidence but she literally vomited the second she saw my penis.
His dick might not be the answer to my problems, but I'm definitely ok with testing it as a possible solution.
You kept spitting the skittles out cause you said they tasted like "balls of sandpaper"
I'm in charge of his party but you're a paramedic, we're both needed.
I mean there is a rehab there so its gotta be a good time
We could all 3 jump out of a cake in just tophats. A true marble cake.
The party got hot, we all started raging, took off some clothes, someone threw me in the shower and we all kept raging. Nude Rager, I was there at the point of conception.
Your biggest crisis right now is that you can't decide whether to keep hooking up with AN NFL PLAYER or try to rekindle your relationship with your ex. You are a walking white girl problem.
He's balder, I'm skinnier. I win. I. Win.
I just forgot I was standing up.
I'm taking the day off so I can get drunk at Whole Foods before noon
I called him Oliver all night
His name is Brandon
Dude... Those don't even start with the same letter...
Randomize
