The way white people respond to them, you'd think Journey was the president of Caucasia.
I dont wanna date her. I just wanna be able to run a blacklight over her face and prove ownership.
We're upstairs smoking....the password is pineapple
He offered to take me out to a nice dinner but I told him I would rather he just pay for my beer this weekend
I'm covered in salsa and facewash. I think I'm doing something wrong over here.
And I know a few people wouldnt want to even be around high people. Which is sad. But jet packs are cool.
In retrospect pumpkin carving while drinking Patron was a bad idea.
Same here... Well I was planning on having some sort of deep conversation, but looking at how grim of an outlook tomorrow has on you, I'll just re-inform you that I have your pants.
Me and the guy at the liquor store are on a first name basis, college is all about networking.
I can motorboat myself in this new push-up bra. I need to go out tonight.
It's like god made him fantastic at oral to make up for what his mouth does the rest of the time.
I did it on acid. I can cook bacon on any condition
The bros used their bong water as pong water but I walked in mid game and didn't know so they hit our first cup and I chugged it.
I just noticed that pic of your cock has a Christmas tree in the background. It's July.
Why would you get kicked out?
Well, an overweight man is currently not wearing a shirt. Or pants. And is getting in touch with his inner Chippendale. You can probably fill in the blanks.
Randomize
