I feel that the whole multiple orgasm thing is god's way of saying "sorry for the childbirth deal"
I know I am usually the slut but tonight it's her. She is being a slut, yes slut, T as in Tomorrow, U as in Uterus, L as in Llama and S as in Sangria. That spells slut, but backwards and that's what she is being.
Does the blue bra belong to your sister or cousin?
oh, you know. just sitting in my bed high as fuck wearing a windbreaker and watching british tv.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Oh please tell me that I'm sleeping in your shower and not the neighbor's again
So awkward... The newspaper lady just caught me sitting stoned in my driveway at 5 am and asked if I was okay. I'm way better than ok right now
I haven't found him passed out in the living room covered in noodles for a while now so I guess he's getting better with the drinking.
From russia with love. But also with chlamydia.
Please assure him that the flying penis statue is for display purposes only.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'll always remember 2012 as the year I hooked up with countless girls who had the sides of their heads shaved.
But I swear to god if I'm awkwardly there while you try to have sex with someone again I'm getting high with your dad
Dying on my bathroom floor at 7 am, I would rather be eaten by a shark right now
You owe me beer. On another note, I made out with the ups guy at work today ....
The minute he showed me his Mumford and sons tattoo is the minute i could literally feel my pussy dry up
I'm no longer puke free since 2013 am I.
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