It's like there testing me. My dad kept handing me margaritas and saying "you can take it"
Do you remember unrolling paper towels as a blanket?
Osama's death just kick started our Cinco de mayo celebration. Margaritas for anyone wearing red white and blue!
why are all my papers due the day after my potential hangover
You have a roommate and cry when you see my dick
I actively tried geting in the guy's pants and ended up in the girl's. I'm bad at this whole straight while drunk thing.
I got a blowjob dressed with a t shirt sweatpants and a Fanny pack. Not kidding.
Apparently that big girl from last night tried to take me upstairs when I was blacked out and all I did was grab Qs arm and whisper 'don't let her take me'
You have ruined sex with him for me. Now all I think is "boy scout" and I want to go home
What's an appropriate outfit for wearing to hangout with a girl you've talked to once, and had a 4way with?
Overheard a drunk girl talk about how when she's drunk she believes in more than one God
Like, defending PBR and Bio Dome consumes a lot of my time.
it's not rock bottom until you fall down an escalator on the way home from a hookup and have to have you dad come pick your drunkass up at 3am. Adulthood.
Is it just me or is it like a girl gets married and all of a sudden she’s a “blogger”?
I wish I had a tail.
Why?
...why not?
Randomize
