who cares. he's ugly and has a dick this big -->
there's paper in my vomit.
I am going to invent a chocolate mix for sperm.
If you don't answer the phone then I will be forced to leave you a wonderful voicemail of me throwing up
chicago's viagra triangle is not unlike the bermuda triangle in thatt things just get lost...... planes, ships, dignity, virginity, etc.
lets have sex before this no shave november shit gets outta hand.
hows a nice way to say "yeah i would go to your dorm, but it's snowing and I know you're not going to blow me, so what's the point"?
It looks alright. The blow up doll is in the microwave, and she has forks in her ass
I made him recite stats from the playoffs game last night before I would go down on him.
Just followed a blind kid around for 20 minutes to see how awesome his guide dog was. And he was pretty fucking awesome
Note to self. The tub labelled "not water" does not contain water.
I don't want his dick, I want his flame thrower!!
In between explaining the best feminist lenses for the myth of Persephone and doing vodka shots with my friends she dragged me into my car and gave me an Earth shattering blow job. Honestly I think I'm in love.
Your youporn search history says otherwise.
So was it everything you dreamed it would be
I puked.
Twice.
So is that a yes?
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