i met a boy and i'm in lovvvvveeeeeeee and we're going to vegas and getting marrrrrriiiieeeeedddddd!
let's be honest with each other here, that's about the worst idea you've ever had. you need to walk this one off.
I saw a chick at 8 am this morning walking back to my dorm wearing wings... I'm kind of jealous.
Dude I gave him a bj because he was upset about the NFL draft, if that doesn't lock it down, i don't know what does
there is potential here for me to have a consistent access to someone's dick who isn't actually an asshole. i think i'm ready for a relationship.
$1 margaritas. This happy hour needs to end.
You have all of her herpes and none of my sympathy
I sexy timed too hard and there is an ass shaped piece of a ping pong table now missing bc of it. How am I allowed to leave the house without a helmet?
If kinky sex was an Olympic sport they would be playing the anthem for me as we speak.
He just kept repeating "not with an octopus" over and over for hours. Soooooo Porn Dare was a succes.
I didn't get a chance to take any pics but the mental snapshot of her boyfriend calling her directly after we finished was a really special moment I wish I could properly share with you.
We are not in a rock band. We can't continue living like this.
So I've discovered that being hungover at 25 feels the same as being hungover at 24. Happy Birthday to me.
you guys have a strange definition of the word fun. I would have said dangerous, terrifying, or life-threatening. of course, bowling can now be described the same way.
I got pulled over by the same cop in a 4.5 hour window. Got off both times. Fuck yes.
I’m 95% positive I adopted a bunny last night.
You had cocktails, didn’t you?
Randomize
