Okay just took the preggers test..and im NOT! :)
awesome babe! drinks tonight!
Wait does the happy face mean yes? fuck.
why is it that everyone in pennsylvannia gets fucking prego??
If he doesn't notice me by the next party, i'm just gonna go up to him and pll his pants down and blow him.
Sounds like a plan.
neither the pictures you took nor my hangover explain why there are skittles in my shoe
I wish i could call my weed and hear it ring. That's how i found my phone.
my whole body is tingling just thinking about the orgasm hes going to give me
i walked toward the cop car thinking it was the liquor store lights nd by that time it was too late to escape the trap
we were bear claw grabbing his crotch in the middle of the bar yelling prominent ridge over and over.
I think I just inadvertently started a sex competition with my roommate and her boyfriend.
You say you're gonna take rehab seriously... but i keep imagining it as a training montage for you preparing to snort all of columbia.
That actually is really sweet of you
with a cock that big I don't even care that he makes a convincing drag queen
i can trust myself, just not when im drunk. and drinking is my favorite pastime
my nose is crying tears of wow.
This is the third time I have overheard parents tell their children "don't be that girl" in reference to me. I'm either doing something horribly wrong or amazingly right
i just woke up on the desk in his dorm with him snoring in my vagina. better than last week waking up to a different guy puking on my bare ass i guess.
Randomize
