i know we just met, but i forget your name, and i'm wondering why my penis burns?
sunday morning discovery: something purple, smelly, and sticky my hair. any suggestions?
I'm getting the same feeling waiting for the web-page to load that has my final grades that I get when I take a pregnancy test. I think I'm gonna leave my computer for 3 minutes.
third eye blind makes so much more sense now that i have a drug problem
Sorry for punching you in the face last night. I should have known the boxing gloves were a bad idea from the start.
Girl passed out in class and vomited. Another victim of syllabus week
I might be a bit. I accidently started hot boxing the bathroom. I'm just gonna go with it.
P.S. I just watched The Muppets. I feel like I just got a sadness enema.
It's pizza for people who hate themselves. I rang the place up once i'd finished and told them if i was on death row it would be my last meal because by the time i'd got half way through it I would be begging to die.
But then I ordered two more because it was 2-4-1 and my life is a mess
Because everytime she talks to you she goes in her room and plays Come Sail Away on repeat. Can't take this shit anymore Jake
How long have I been using my debit card as a coaster?
So our bartender was in the bathroom the same time I was so I ordered a beer mid stream.....is that weird?
he's been dating her for 18 months and cheating on her with me for 16. if that's not commitment, i don't know what is.
Just reached for my phone in my non existant pocket while it was in my hand.
I was simply suggesting that you really should try coke bondage sex.
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