actually, I'm a sock model
yo my bday is less then one week away. hope youve found another annoying candian i can lick dairy products off of. also sorry about your loss
I hated hipsters before it was mainstream.
I don't want end up bound and gagged in the back of a van headed for rehab. Bound and gagged OK. Just not the rehab part.
In hindsight buying the pill crusher with my vicodin prescription might have been too much.
I am VERY upset that you called my fiesta a waste of time.
All I could think about when I saw her was that she could be the mother of my future first round draft picks
it's graduation. he's gonna get congratulations slash emotional i cant believe youre leaving me sex.
Dude. Why is there a hamster in my pocket? WHAT THE FUCK WAS IN THAT JOINT
I can't finger myself when I'm all distracted about whether or not your family is going to like me
Did I really drink that whole bottle of Jack Daniels last night?
Heroically.
Sounds good. Look at us. Planning sex like proper adults.
sometimes you just have to listen to beyonce and cry. that's how life works
Apparently I told him the people made me order taco bell I didn't even want it. And then proceeded to turn off all the lights and sit at the kitchen table in the dark and told him not to look at me.
Did we go to Florida? My missing thong and DL just arrived in the mail. Return address was Tampa.
Randomize
