Don't worry, nothing happened....but we should have a fire extinguisher here.
5am is far to early to be on jagerbomb number 6 right now
He legit asked if he could come over for a hug. I feel like I've been booty called by a 12 year old.
I left my pipe in my center console with a bowl packed when I took my car to the shop, and when I picked it up the weed had been smoked, but my oil change was only half price.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Girl, that was the lost night of 2012 for me and I have buried that night deep deep away..
I am the prescription. I can be taken orally or vaginally and in any dosage. This is why I went to med school.
He told me his cum shot melted the paint on his bedroom wall and asked if I want to see it
BECAUSE THIS IS AMERICA AND DONUTS AND TITTIES AND ALCOHOL IS WHAT THIS COUNTRY WAS FOUNDED ON
I was thinking that maybe I should not apply to Wells Fargo because they def have me on candid camera taking a drunken nap at 3am in their lobby.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The worst part was when I went to go spit it out and rinse my mouth, his grandpa was in the bathroom, so I had to fucking wait. It was awful. I finally ran to the kitchen and prayed his parents didn't come out of their room.
I am going to go Miley Cyrus crazy if I don't get sex soon
Headline in the alligator: young zeta goes berserk after lack of sex and is found naked swinging from wrecking ball on university ave, refuses to get down until sex partner is found
Also, you should've bet on Team Liver.
We won.
USA USA USA
I really don't know where my pants are, but that's not the problem. When are you going to unlock the door?
I have standards. Maybe not when it comes to men.. but definitely when it comes to sex
Apparently I thought every drink in my house needed to have a buddy so I put some vodka in each one. Long story short being wasted at work because the gatorade you brought is 60% liqour is not a great idea.
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