I just had the ultimate walk of shame. I'm barefoot, in his gym short with vomit in my hair and I walked half a mile through campus. At noon. Thanks for picking up ur phone
She refers to my dick as princess Sarah... oddly I'm okay with that.
How far into the semester do we have to be before it's ok to get drunk in between classes again?
Just threw up on my desk at work. They are making me go home.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'll bring the barf blanket just in case.
Nothing sez sunday morning like waking up in a phonebooth with a leg cramp.
You can identity the picture as me the mistress his wife and him. It's that kinda awkard.
My 16 year old neighbor is throwing a rager cuz her parents are out of town and my brother and I are sitting on the porch listening to A) someone fuck on the trampoline B) a girl bawling about her parents finding out C) someone puking in what we think is the hot tub. And overall we take a shot everytime someone says "bra"
The guy I woke up with is wearing the same nailpolish as me...I need to stop drinking
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Fuck yeah GAYNESS
*explodes into glitter*
I would professionally fuck the shit out of her
Can't really tell your Mom you are moody due to dick deprivation.
Fuck it, I'm going to make my own dick pic album since iOS 10 won't do it for me.
Three times. Three times I left home yesterday in search for sex, and three times I returned un-orgasmed.
Swear on my life the dude next to us just ordered a pizza and I will fight to the death for a slice
Randomize